Chris Duel

Broadcaster, Soul Provider

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The Lunatic Inside Your Head

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Change Your Thoughts, Change Your World

There is a lunatic living inside your head. This lunatic is feeding your mind with fear based thoughts that are distorting your clearest, highest and most accurate perception of the world.
In Zen they call this Monkey Mind. In A Course in Miracles and psychology they call this Ego. The author Steven Pressfield calls this Resistance.
Ego is not your friend.
But you need not be victimized by the fearful, negative, angry thoughts of this lunatic. You can get clear. You can center yourself. You can ease your mind and transcend the lunatic.
The calm you seek is inside of you and as close as your next breath. Meditation can take you there, Music can take you there, Nature can take you there, your Beloved can take you there.
Go there. And go back there as often as you possibly can.
The choice of Love over Fear is yours and it’s the most important choice you will make every day of your life.

 

One Year Ago Tonight

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Our beloved furry friend transitioned into the spirit world a year ago tonight.

The kitty statuette on the left of the above photo is an urn containing her ashes.

We didn’t really adopt Blackcat.  She adopted us.

She was a feral cat outside our window for many years.

She distrusted humans.  They almost certainly hurt her. An x-ray would eventually reveal she had been shot at some time in her life.

But we crossed paths. We fed her and earned her trust.  And we became a part of her life 15 years ago.

On a cold winter’s night, she needed a warm place to sleep and we had one.

Eventually she moved in with us and became part of our family.

Saying goodbye to a beloved pet is truly saying goodbye to a member of your family.

It is gut wrenching.

She brought us love, laughter and joy.

But on this night a year ago, there were tears, sorrow and grief.

On the evenings before she passed, I would gently pet her.

She purred, as if to say, “I understand. And I love you too.”

Just before midnight, after much reluctance and soul searching, Beth took her to an animal hospital nearby to humanely end her suffering. I was working a Spurs broadcast that night, so I met them at the hospital in time to say goodbye.

The 15 years we had with Blackcat had ended. Moments like these remind us of the fleeting nature of our time together.

When I started my car to pull out of the hospital parking lot, the dashboard clock glowed 12:00 midnight and a song began on a random satellite radio station I happened to be tuned to.

The song was “A Thousand Years” by Christina Perri.

I would later learn it was from the “Twilight” movie saga, which I have never seen, and I had not heard the song before.

In the raw emotion and grief of the moment, it was as if a cosmic DJ, the Universe or Blackcat herself played this song just for me.

Here are the lyrics…

Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I’m afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt, suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

I have died everyday, waiting for you
Darling, don’t be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything, take away
What’s standing in front of me
Every breath, every hour has come to this

One step closer

I have died everyday, waiting for you
Darling, don’t be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed, I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me, I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

One step closer
One step closer

I have died everyday, waiting for you
Darling, don’t be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed, I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me, I have loved you for a thousand years
I’ll love you for a thousand more

Tears streamed down my face, clouding my eyes and transforming the passing city lights, whirling by the windshield, into streaking translucent tears across the starry sky.

Souls cross paths. Human souls and animal souls.

We meet, we dance, we love.

And all too soon, we say goodbye. At least for now.

But that love is eternal.

And we will meet again.

For a thousand years. And a thousand more.

 

 

Equinox

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Equinox arrives

From the heavens
Amid the starry sky
Flashes of lightning
Illuminate awakening
To the season of Spring
And the end of Winter
With its loss and grief
Days growing longer
But for this moment
All is equal
Light and Darkness
Hope and Fear
Pleasure and Pain
Chaos and Serenity
The unseen world appears
Translucently amid the twilight
I open my arms
Gaze to the sky
Listen intently
To the music of the spheres
And I am equal
To the bliss
To the fear
To the love
Welcome Equinox

 

We are Ghosts, Sleepwalking in the Dreamscape

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I was randomly flipping through a journal from last year and stumbled upon the passage above.

The word “ghosts” reminded me of the final track of Dan Fogelberg’s 1981 album, The Innocent Age.

The song is “Ghosts.” It’s mystical, haunting and evocative. On many levels, it’s my favorite Fogelberg tune and most people have probably never heard it.
It’s one of those songs that can take you into another dimension.

It’s fascinating that dimensions ranging from Heaven to Hell, from despair to bliss, are accessible in virtually every moment.

Here is Dan Fogelberg’s “Ghosts” via YouTube.  I didn’t create the video, but it’s not a bad visualization of the song…

 

Brothers of The Sky

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Chris & The Total Eclipse 1991

The longest total solar eclipse of the 20th Century – July 11, 1991

Twenty-five years ago today, at high noon, I watched day turn to night in the ancient Aztec village of Ixtlán de las Garzas, Mexico.

For nearly eight minutes (the longest total solar eclipse of the 20th Century) I was bathed in the dark, fleeting shadow of the Moon.

The Sun disappeared. The stars sparkled in the eerie twilight sky at midday as the temperature fell several degrees.

It was an experience so cosmically profound that its mystical echo reverberates through my psyche all these years later.

Within minutes, the Sun emerged from behind the Moon and daytime returned across Mexico.

For human beings to be directly in the shadow of the Moon is a very rare event. You must either find a way into the path of a total solar eclipse or have been one of the 27 Apollo astronauts who circled around the dark side of the Moon in the late Sixties and early Seventies.

While viewing a lunar eclipse (the Moon moving into the Earth’s shadow) or a partial solar eclipse (the Sun not fully obscured by the shadow of the Moon) is relatively common, a total solar eclipse is one of the rarest celestial events to be witnessed from this planet.

This transcendent moment was especially meaningful because I shared it with one of my dearest friends, Henry Iglesias, a singer-songwriter and Renaissance man.

Henry and his family were originally from Mexico, so were watching this eclipse from his native soil.

Henry was my guide into his ancestral homeland and into the shadow of the Moon.

1991 Mexico Eclipse

With Henry, hours before the Total Solar Eclipse – July 11, 1991

Those moments in the Moon’s shadow with Henry were among the most magical moments of my life.

Henry In The Shadow of The Moon

In 2007, much too young, Henry left this Earthly existence.  He was taken by a brain tumor nine months after his diagnois.

Every July 11th, I think of Henry and I think of those few moments in the shadow of the Moon.

In honor of the Henry and the Eclipse, I offer you two expressions of art.  The first is a poem of mine and the second is Henry’s quintessential offering, the last song he wrote and produced before his passing.

First, my poem…

A remembrance of our time in the Moon’s shadow…

With Henry, In The Shadow Of The Moon”

Another time

Another century

Another life.

But the time

And the century

And the life

Were mine.

And his.

Planets were aligning

Celestial spheres inexorably drawn.

Eleventh of July, 1991.

When the heavens offer a gift

You must be present to receive.

He led me into Mexico

The land of his birth

The land would birth me

To transcendence

To bliss

To awe.

I knew he was my friend

I know he was my shaman

Guiding me to the light

And the shadow

Where few have truly been:

Astronauts orbiting the lunar dark side

And fortunate few on the planet

Or dreamers like us

Who seek the shadow.

We arrived on hallowed ground

On ancient Aztec soil

Eyes cast skyward

The shadow rushing toward us

We felt it coming

The animals, birds, insects, trees felt it coming.

All became still

Temperature dropped

Time fell away

And then, oh, so suddenly

It… all… merged…

Sun, Moon, Shadow, Earth

Moon, Earth, Shadow, Sun

Earth, Sun, Shadow, Moon

Sun, Moon, Shadow

Moon, Shadow

Shadow

Shadow

Shadow

Here.

Now.

Day turned to night.

I.

I. See.

I. See. Stars.

I. See. Stars. At. Noon.

Henry, look at the stars!

And the Sun eclipsed by the Moon

Oh!

My!

God!

Rapt.

Bathed in the splendor

Of the cosmic dance of spheres

In holy, holy, holy communion.

Eternal

My friend, my shaman

Thank you for guiding me there

Years fly by.

You find true love

You write and sing

About the Smile of God

And Brothers of The Sky

And then, oh, so suddenly

Your body eclipsed by a brain tumor

Henry, look at the stars!

They shine with you among them.

The shadow lingers

Your spirit lives.

Another time

Another century

Another life.

If I go back

To seek the shadow

Will you meet me there?

Years before Henry died, he told me of a vision for a song titled, “Brothers of The Sky.”

It was about your ultimate brother or guide or guardian angel who will fly you from this world to the next.

The idea resonates with me, having lost my older brother Greg at a young age and more recently, having lost Henry and other dear friends and loved ones.

In the final months of his life, although he was battling a brain tumor and all of the debilitating challenges that come with it, Henry managed to record and produce his farewell song as the final track on his last album.

I see it as the culmination of his life’s work as an artist, a father, a son, a husband and a human being.

Here it is…

“Brothers of The Sky”

Words and Music by Henry Iglesias

I am the voice inside of you

A whispering constant in your life

Everyone fears the letting go

Until they glimpse the other side

 

I am the voice from far away

I have the ears that hear your prayer

A guardian angel sent to say

Someone out there really cares

 

I’ll take your hand

When it’s time to walk into the night

Please understand

I am your brother in the sky

 

Traveling across the Universe

Children of the stars that burn so bright

Voyaging to foreverness

You and I are brothers of the sky

 

Everyone finds me their own way

In every land and everywhere

Some take a lifetime, some a day

Seeking a piece of Heaven’s share

 

I am the shining star above

I am the glimmer in the light

I am the power of your love

I am your brother in the sky

 

Just take my hand

When it’s time for you to say goodnight

And we will fly

A wondrous journey deep into the light

 

Traveling across eternity

Going to the place we all have been

Going to the place where souls are free

Beyond the timeless stars are friends

 

Traveling into the other side

The universe is all inside God’s eye

Children of the stars eternally

You and I are brothers of the sky

 

Do not fear your own mortality

Cause there’s more to life than meets the eye

In the end all of us will be free

Don’t be afraid to say goodbye

 

I’ll close your eyes

Softly close your eyes

And we will fly

Like brothers of the sky

 

The Universe

The Universe

The Universe

Is all inside God’s eye

Traveling With Henry

Dedicated to the eternal spirit of Henry Robert Iglesias

My Brother of The Sky

“The Love You Take Is Equal To The Love You Make”

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With Alan Weinkrantz at the 2014 KLRN Auction

With Alan Weinkrantz at the 2014 KLRN Auction – June 21, 2014

Last night, in the blink of an eye, my friend Alan Weinkrantz left this world.

He was sitting down to dinner in an outdoor sidewalk cafe on a beautiful, starry June night.

I saw the news of his death appear on my iPhone around 9:30pm while I was participating in the final night of the KLRN Auction, raising funds for San Antonio’s PBS television station.  Seconds later, KLRN VP Katrina Kehoe walked down the stairs from her position coordinating auction activities.  I could see by the look of shock on her face that she had just read the news as well.  We couldn’t wrap our heads around the notion that Alan was gone.

Alan volunteered for the KLRN Auction every year.  He would probably have been with us last night if he were not in Israel, where he traveled frequently to participate in the country’s growing tech community.

When I read that Alan died at a Tel Aviv sidewalk cafe, my first thought was that an act of terror must have taken place. This was not terrorism, however, but a very tragic accident.

Reports indicate that as Alan was having dinner, a man had a heart attack while driving his car at a high rate of speed.  The out of control vehicle instantaneously jumped the curb and slammed into the tables of the outdoor cafe.

Alan, another restaurant patron and the driver were killed at the scene.  Six others were injured.

Alan was a wonderful man who exuded joy and enthusiasm.  He was an evangelist and mentor for the tech and start up communities in San Antonio, in Israel and around the world.

He had a passion for technology, innovation, entrepreneurship and music.  We shared a love for The Beatles and had wonderful conversations about the brilliance of their songs.

One of the most mind expanding ideas that Alan shared with me was that rock and roll music is code, akin to the code that is used to program computer software and apps.

Alan Weinkrantz's 1005 Faces photo

Alan Weinkrantz’s 1005 Faces photo

As Alan said in this interview,

The idea began during I period when I was spending a lot of time at a good friend’s high-end guitar shop in San Antonio. Being surrounded by music all the time I started studying the history of rock n’ roll. And then it hit me.

It’s all code.

I went back in time, listening to old albums from the Kinks, the Who, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones. I realized that all the albums, the songs, the lyrics — they’re code. The code isn’t manifested as “lines of code” but rather in the stories built, layered and played.

If you look at the way musical history progressed, it seems each band was creating a new experience for their audience — not just musically but, story wise. We’re talking about their narrative, where they came from, how they got famous, their clothes, their sound and the overall experience which is just as important as the music itself — if not more.

Just like startups.

And just like startups, Rock & roll bands, work together iteratively. Collaboratively. And hopefully, harmonically.

I will always remember Alan for his contagious sense of wonder and his passion for big ideas. He mentored people of all ages seeking to find their path in a complex digital world, including me.

I trust he’s now in Rock and Roll Heaven, making music, creating code and embarking on his next cosmic adventures.

In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.  – The Beatles

Beatles fan Alan Weinkrantz on Abbey Road

Beatles fan Alan Weinkrantz on Abbey Road

 

Learn more about Alan in this story by Bob Rivard in his Rivard Report.

Alan's Facebook Cover Photo - His laptop at a sidewalk cafe

Alan’s Facebook cover photo – His laptop at a sidewalk cafe

Above:  Alan’s Facebook cover photo.  His Mac at night at an outdoor cafe with the words, “Do Something That Matters.”

Perfect.

Music of The Spheres

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Listen...

Listen…

 

At night if you’re silent enough

…if you’re centered enough

…if you’re open enough

you can hear

the music of the spheres

 

Spheres, Muses, Angels

singing, whispering their secrets

 

The secrets you’ve known

for ten thousand years

but had forgotten

until just now

Autumnal Equinox

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AutumnalEquinoxPic

 

(2am 9/22/2013)

summer has ended

i felt this coming

light and warmth waning

portending the fall
and the coming winter

while days draw shorter
and the chilly darkness grows

but for this moment

this one moment

this Now

all is equal

balanced

sublime

light and darkness

hope and fear

pleasure and pain

chaos and serenity

laughter and tears

koyaanisqatsi and bliss

the unseen world appears
translucently amid the twilight

i open my arms

gaze to the delirious sky

listening intently

to the music of the spheres

and I am equal

to the love

to the fear

to the euphoria

to the yin and the yang

of the great unknown

and I surrender

to the autumnal equinox

Why I Love Joe Cocker

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Joe Cocker

Joe Cocker

 

Joe Cocker has passed away just before Christmas.

He wasn’t Elvis or Michael Jackson or John Lennon.

He wasn’t a superstar.  But he was a star, nonetheless.

In my life, he was a transcendent musical force.

His voice and his music have been a part of my personal soundtrack since I begged my older sister Beth to take me to see his “Mad Dogs & Englishmen” documentary in 1971.

I was 10 and my sister was 16.  She was going on a date to see the movie. Of course, she didn’t want to take her little brother on the date.  Who would?

But I lobbied, begged, and cajoled Beth to take me on her date with Charlie Johnson ( 44 years later, I still remember his name ).

And because she’s never refused anything of her little brother, she took me along to see the movie at the Central Park Fox Theatre in San Antonio.  I’m sure her date was thrilled to have me tagging along.

Sitting in the dark theatre, I was mesmerized by the film.  Joe Cocker’s passionate, borderline spastic performance blew my 10-year-old mind.

I was hooked. 

I got my hands on the “Mad Dogs & Englishmen” LP and listened to it again and again.

Joe Cocker’s heart, his soul, his beautifully unorthodox voice told me…

That if you sing from your heart, your message will resonate with those who should hear it.

We all have a song to sing. 

Whether you’re actually singing or metaphorically singing.

If your voice is authentic, people will connect with it.

That’s my takeaway from Joe Cocker…

Sing your song, sing from your heart and the right people will get you.

Rest in Peace, Joe Cocker.

You made magic on Earth, Space Captain.

Thank you.